You’ve all been with a guy (or known someone who’s been with a guy) who seems really great at first, but upon closer inspection, raises tons of red flags. It’s not a fun thing to deal with but it happens all the time.
If you find yourself doubting your compatibility with the guy you’re dating, take a look to see if he has any of the following qualities. If he does, you might need to re-evaluate your relationship because there’s a huge chance he’ll never change.
Does Being Around Him Make You Feel Self-Conscious?
Your boyfriend is supposed to contribute to the creation of a loving, caring environment. You aren’t supposed to feel like he’s constantly judging or belittling you. Does he take into account your feelings or desires and talk to you about them? Or does he just write them off and ignore them until they go away? If he does the latter, there will have to be some kind of miracle for that attitude to change. Guys who don’t care about your feelings, wants and needs right now probably never will.
Does He Ignore You Around His Friends?
Of course all guys will act differently towards you around their friends to a certain degree (no one needs to see you guys constantly being gushy during a group outing), but this is a more noticeable change. If your boyfriend doesn’t pay you any attention while you’re out with him and his boys, something isn’t right. He should be maintaining a balance of bro-love and girlfriend-love. If he can’t find that balance, so long sucka. Your guy should want people to know how much he loves and cares about you, not hide it from everyone.
Does He Get Super Jealous?
At some point, a stranger might give you elevator eyes or a flirtatious compliment while you’re out with your boyfriend. Will your boyfriend flip out and get all crazy on you because of it? Hello anger management and jealousy issues. It’s one thing if he makes a funny comment or maybe gets annoyed for a second, but if he turns all Hulk on you, you probably need to take a step back. Take note of jealousy or anger issues and see if they make up a large part of your boyfriend’s character. If they do, think about whether you want to stay on the arm of someone like that.
Does He Refuse to Interact with Your Family and Friends?
I once dated a guy who never wanted to go out with my family or friends. He always wanted me to go out with his friends and family, but never the other way around. It was a clear sign of disrespect. Your friends and family are part of who you are and if they’re important to you, your boyfriend needs to make an effort. If he refuses, he’s going to keep refusing and you’ll be in for a long, vicious cycle of nonsense.
Each person has their own list of quirky dealbreakers, but the issues above should be immediate red flags. If you talk to your guy about the his behavior and he doesn’t hear you out, he’s never going to. Take it as a loss. You need someone who already knows that listening and respect are the glue of every healthy, loving relationship. Move on until you find someone that you don’t have to change.